Discovering Your Why

How often are you asked “What do you do?” It’s such a ubiquitous question we hardly think twice about asking it or answering it. What if the follow up question was “Why do you do that?”

Would you be taken aback? Would the answer come as easily as the “what” response? Think for a moment how you’d respond to that question right now. Slow down and notice what’s happening in your mind and in your body.

What Do You Notice?

For some, the answer to that question can be felt. You may notice a sensation in your belly or chest. You know there’s a Why behind the What somewhere, but it feels much more intangible and distant. It’s hard to put the words to the feeling.

For others, there is more of a disconnect from the body. There is no noticeable sensation in the belly or heart, but the words come easily, loaded with practicality and story;

“Decent pay, great benefits”

“When I graduated it was the first company to hire me and I’ve been there ever since”

“It lets me have a flexible schedule so I can stay home with the kids”

What if you could experience both the expanding heart sensation and the ability to articulate that with ease? What if you were able to live out your Why without even changing your What? Discovering your Why  allows you to do just that.

But this is about so much more than being able to share your Why!

Discovering your Why and rooting into that allows you to rise strong, confident in your power and purposeful in your decisions. This isn’t about finding your best suited occupation. This is about living your best life!

The Map to Discovering Your Why

The following actions are outlined in step-by-step detail in the Why Discovery Map. This process has the power and potential to change everything for you! If you commit to doing the work, seeking support, and going all in I can promise you your life will be filled with more meaning, purpose, and joy!

  1. Life Mapping: Reflect on the events that had the greatest impact on you. These may be positive, expansive experiences, or constricting, painful, confusing times in your life.
  2. Story Sharing: Keep in mind your WHY for being here is about your unique contribution to the world. It’s about doing something outside of yourself. Having this outside perspective of others is crucial.
  3. Self-Reflection: I share key questions to ask yourself in the Why Discovery Map which is a free resource. Grab it here.
  4. Declaration: This is where you create a simple but powerful statement that you can share easily and repeat often to connect with the Why behind the What in all you do.

“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”
― Friedrich Nietzsche

The Brain Science Behind Discovering Your Why

In Discovering Your Why

Your formative years (birth through about 19) is when your brain is growing and forming at the highest rate. This is the reason the experiences and events that occur during that time have the greatest impact on your psyche and development. These events, both peaks and valleys, provide you with a wealth of information, gifts, and wisdom which helps you carry out your purpose and impact the world.

The events that follow your formative years still play a very important role in discovering the Heart of your Why. When you look into the stories of these experiences you can see that they affirm your purpose either by showing that you were either in, or out of alignment with that earlier formed purpose.

In Putting Words to Your Why

Even though you may feel deeply connected to your Why, it may be surprisingly difficult to put words to it. When you are connecting to the energy of your heart, buzzing and fluttering with passion and excitement, the Limbic area of your brain is firing in overdrive! This is the area of your brain responsible for emotions.

When it’s time to put words to those feelings, your Neocortex, the area of the brain responsible for language and logic, is where those words will be generated. While by no means impossible, it can be difficult for the Neocortex to generate words that do justice to all those big feelings happening inside the Limbic area.

If you struggle to find the right words, know that you’re not alone and that it’s a completely normal and expected part of the process! It does not mean you’ve gone off track somewhere! Start by pulling out some key phrases or words that resonate with you. Play with language. Know that this declaration of Why can and will evolve over time as you live out your Why each day!

I offer a simple fill-in-the-blank template to help get you started here.

How to Live Out Your Why

Discovering the Heart of your Why is only the beginning of the most meaningful and purpose-driven adventure you’ll ever embark on! There are specific activities and exercises you can easily integrate into your life that keeps you rooted in your Why.

Through these activities and exercises you will learn to create and access new tools, develop vital skills, and cultivate support in taking real, inspired, action toward living out your Why each and every day.

This image illustrates the framework I help each woman grow inside our Wild, Wise, & Rising program. If you’d like to learn more about how I can help you plant your seed of purpose and grow it into a thriving, healthy, sustainable life of meaning and impact, email me now and we can set up a quick chat.

When your Why is at the heart of all you do, you bring tremendous value to this world and live with greater fulfillment and joy!

What’s your Why? I’d love for you to share your imperfect, ever-evolving declaration with me! Comment below or email me at

May you find everything you need within your own heart, and may that lead you to your next Watershed moment!


My name is Melissa Bennett. Whether on site or online, I inspire & support women just like YOU to move through fear and reclaim the lost parts of themselves in order to live a life of confidence, courage, & creative expression. I too have journeyed the path of self-reclamation and continue to do so every day. It is my greatest gift and honor to guide you on your path to the most sacred of all places - your own wild heart. To discover how we can work together to bring you back to your self, connect with me on my site at

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